Is nothing personal, it's just my circumstances...

As most people knew, yes I started working a month ago...

and as most people knew, I quit last Friday...

so, yeah, I just work for a month?

Why? I don't know...

Little that I know, that Thursday when I meet Matul and Jack, I end up working as a cashier at Popular Bookstore...

The story of my impulse behaviour...

To tell the truth, I did really had a hard time adjusting as a cashier... with all the scanning, barcode, buttons, coins, short or over and RM 10 note that always run out... I always find myself confused and dreaded the day... to make it worse, I work from 10.30am to 9.30 pm and on weekends 10.00 am to 10.00 pm... or is it because of the senior cashier and supervisor that are quite 'garang'...

I almost felt I want to quit the first day of work... I do actually...

I tell myself, I will get use to this after awhile.. and I do, after three days I think..

(which is after my first off-day)

but seriously it's nothing related to this place I work... it is just due to my circumstances that I can only work for a month. Given the thought if I for sure will only continue my study next year, I might still working there? (maybe?)

Well, the whole month was a great exprience.. yeah, I was never a cashier and yes, I don't really give a damn if I'm late for something..

but since there are something we call 'PUNCHCARD' , and it will turn red if you are late, I get worry.. but nonetheless, Fana will always will be Fana, by the end of the month I alway got red. But I believe, it was pretty decent compared to other staffs.

It does make me sick, counting money everyday

(especially when the money does not belong to you)...hhhhhhhh....

and comment I heard while counting after closing the store, 'lembablah'...

not only I it was hurtful, it was also distracting... making me lost count and makin 'lembab'...

I also met new people there... and I appreciate the new friendship created there...

too bad, I can't get to know them better, but it was great guys, so thank you...

to be honest, I do notice and realize something...

probably I am still not cut out for the working world,

but maybe I'm saying this because I'm not that desperate for money yet..

people work to make a living...

even they hate it, they hate their collegues or employer , maybe..

but they still got up to work because they want to make a living...

but please, it never crossed my mind to undermine a 3 figure pay-job...

I do really appreciate the experience of working at the Popular Bookstore, Ampang Point Outlet.

PS: You know, as I always predicted, I get to meet many friends from my old school...

My juniors, my old classmates and also seniors... not to forget even my neighbour...

and I believe my old schoolmates is replacing me as the new cashier... well good luck for you...

PSS: Since it was been a month, I haven't really updating my blog...

but there are ideas for my vanity posts... I will update on that...

I am working...

this is just short update...

I have started working... yes , finally venturing into the working life... that feel with shift hours and punching cards...

to tell the truth, I'm not really enjoying... that explain why I decide only to work for a month...

yes, i do excited to get paycheck later, but this is not what is it about... I just... you know, looking for experience.. I work as a cashier at Popular Ampang Point, in my whole life never I imagined I work as cashier... however, it has been about a week...

Ps: I just got back from work... today was suppose to be the day, my result be out..but, what to do? I had to wait until I got home then get to check my IB EXAM... RESULT>>>>....

wish me all the best!

Nude natural look... oopppsss... I should have use my stuff instead...

This look is very-very suitable, for sunny country especially Malaysia... I wonder why people are too crazy to look white, while being gold or even bronze is still attractive... this goes to all tanned skin girls out there... Instead of trying to look fairer and pinkier, how about looking like a gold-goddess, or bronze-maiden... I would say this look take not much effort, and it can be an everyday make-up...

So the effort is getting the perfect base...This is how I do this look.

(I did this on my sis... too lazy to do on myself)
1. Apply your base makeup (liquid or powder foundation, or BB cream... whatsoever but must match your skintone accordingly). It is advisable to forgone pinkish skinbase or anything you use that make your face pink (forget about pink radiance for this look)
2. If your not satisfy with base go back with the foundation, powder or concealer where is necessary - it is better to start out lighter, then just layer on more product on spots that need more coverage.
3. Bronzers on the hollow of your cheeks.
4. Apply matte eyeshadow, closest to your skintone but lighter, something in light peach, yellow,or beige, all over your eye lid from lashes up to your brow.
5. With bronzers, or bronze-like eyeshadow, but not too dark, apply using eyeshadow brush on the crease of the eye, this is to accentuate the shape of eye and sockets.
6. Reapply, more concentrated the matte lighter eyeshadow on the middle of the eyelid, just under the brow and on the inner corner of the eyes.

(mind her ungroomed brows... but actually her brows are presentable enough)
7. Top it off at the same spot with vanilla shimmery eyeshadow, or gold or bonze (better for darker skin)... you want your skin in the yellow, golden spectrum. Blend well!
8. Apply a nude blusher on the apple of the cheeks and and apply the highlighter on the cheekbones and nose bridge.
9. Line the lashline only on the outer corner with brown eyeliner and to make it stay, top it of with dark brown eyeshadow.
10. Fill in the lip with lipliner – go for nude toward orange, brown, peach but not nude pink or red.
11. Fill your lips with lipstick – again, go for colour toward orange, peach, coral. Probably gloss on top of it, I know many people love gloss.
12. Curl lash , appy lash primer and black mascara , but not too much though.

The finish look (this my sis-she has good skin....~~envy)

Okay, this is not really a statement look, the features are in mid-tone or nude, on the eyes, lips and cheek. There are key items to this look, so I just put out stuff that I used and recommended:-

First : A great BASE Makeup ... I use Revlon Colorstay Liquid Foundation RM55
Second: Nude Blusher and Higlighter ... I use MAC Mineralize Blush in Warm Soul RM95, MAC Fafi Iridescent Powder in Verve-acious RM 80
Third : BROWN eyeliner... not black!
Fourth : Nude and Coral-like lipcolour... lipstick or lipgloss is up to preference. I use MAC Satin Lipstick in Alibi RM 67
Fifth : Light Shimmery Eyeshadow... in vanilla, gold or beige...

PS: As you can see, this is just my way of doing it and it can look too much effort for an everyday look. But all this effort result to the best result you could ever get, like you can how define my sister's lip is and her cheeks are structured. however some people are in a hurry so certain stuff can be left out and be optional.

Mistakes on my acne skincare regimen...

As far as I remember, I have problem with acnes... lots and lots of it... My acne–prone skin does not bear those little whiteheads or red bumps, people usually called zits or boo-boos. Usually I got the hard core one , a cystic acne, which take days to heal and swell up really big... I think that is the one they call ‘jerawat batu’.
Having acnes is one of the reason that I start wearing makeup, but my interest in makeup just grew out more thans just concealing acne. However, now I want to blog about the mistakes I did in my acne skincare regimen.
Okay, I’ve been to a doctor for oral antibiotic treatment but that does not work permanently, and you have to keep coming back. There are other treament such as accutane, laser, and hormone...I just thought I cannot concentrate on the treatment knowing the lack of financial support and dedication since I’m still a student. So, I give this a rest.

Then I discover, Acne.org (you never know how much does acne bother me in my life)... it is wonderful site and I believe everyone can benefit from it. So Dan from Acne.Org has introduce this basic skincare regimen, which is very simple and affordable but sound crazy. It only requires 3 steps

1. Gentle cleansing with gentle cleanser, don’t use cleanser for oily skin.
2. 2.5% Benzoyl Peroxid(BP) Gel . Usually people only heard of 5% Benzoyl Peroxide like OXY5, but it is good enough to use 2.5%. Other stuff like, Tea-tree, Triclosan (T3 pimple gel and biore), Salicylic acid (Sebamed)... I’m not sure how good they are. But I believe BP is the best, where it targeted the bacteria directly by providing oxygen condition (the bacteria are anaerobic, can’t survive in oxygen)... something like that. Well, usually this treatment you use it on spot or area, but for Dan’s regimen, you smeared the stuff all over your face especially the part with acnes. It might seem too much,but it is not.
3. After using the 2.5% BP gel, it will be too dry, so you will need to moisturize. So, last step is to moisturize your face as usual using light moisturizer, it is also adviced to put on sun screen as to protect from UV rays(actually everybody need sunscreen ... not the acne-prones only)

Then I found local forum page (at lowyatt.net I think) which actually use this regimen but with local product and very very affordable..
They recommend , Cetaphill Gentle Cleanser, PanOxyl 2.5% BP Gel and Neutrogena Moisturizer SPF15 or the one for Combination Skin.
I did follow the essence of the skincare regimen which are gentle cleansing, 2.5% BP gel all over my face and gentle Moisturizer. But I added gentle toner, because I can’t let it go. My version : Neutrogena Refreshing Foaming Cleanser, Simple Soothing Facial Toner, PanOxyl 2.5% BP gel, Simple Light Moisturizer.
At first, yeah, it does make a different, even if I change to other brand but keeping the same method, there is no real outbreak like before. And I would say, it control and improve my skin, even better than when I was in secondary school, despite the fact I love wearing makeup (like I said before, makeup does not necessarily cause acne). It is the best skincare regimen I ever tried.

However, after a while I notice that it does not work like it did before... so I visit again Acne.org skincare regimen and I notice a few mistakes I did.
1. Eventhough I was using gentle cleanser but I tend to be harsh while washing my skin. (always in a hurry)
2. I was ‘kedekut’ with my 2.5% BP gel... I was not applying enough 2.5%BP gel.
3. I don’t do the skincare regimen regularly. It is supposed to be done twice a day, 10 to 12 hour part... but lately since sem 4 I seem to get lazy to apply my BP gel. So that is not good.
4. Sometimes, ... this is the worst... I forgot to take off my makeup...

And it does not help especially when I was out a week for BTN where I usually have no time for this and staying at home make me more reluctant to apply BP gel and moisturizer as it should be.
So now, I have to correct all this mistake, not to forget to do this regimen regularly, 2 times daily... and not to be stingy with my 2.5% BP gel. I remember from Female Magazine “sloppy skincare lead to sloppy skin” and let this be a reminder to us all.

PS: I really thankful for the forum that has introduce me to PanOxyl which is much much better acne medication compare to other BP gel such as Oxy... Oxy5 or Oxy10 might work for someone else... but not me... even Clindamycin gel which prescribed by my doctor does not work as efficient as PanOxyl... but the Clindamycin is way better than Oxy 5 or Oxy 10... whatever it is, just try to find out more about acne then you will have an idea of how to control it...

PSS: My dream of how to spend my first paycheck is to get my acne treated with continous antibiotic treatment or maybe hormonal treatment... follow by skin resurfacing treatment that will get rid of the scar on skin.... pudarkan semua kawah-kawah ke kuali macam permukaan bulan...

annoyed by the crowd....Arctic Monkeys: My Propeller...

Alright, I was youtubing (one of my favourite online activities) and suddenly I remember that Arctic Monkeys already release their third single from Humbug music videos, My Propeller. So I search on youtue for the MV, which I believe by now should be available in youtube. However, as I scroll down through all My Propeller available including performance, I notice something...

On the second video, Live@ All points..., I notice on the description, 'the crowd was a bit tame for...' TAME!??? on Arctic Monkeys shows? That makes no sense at all... So, I watch the videos, and yeah, it was tame, dormant, like Arctic Monkeys are a nobody... S***lah wei! worst crowd ever, people would kill just to catch a glimpse of Arctic Monkeys performance(including me) and they... tak tahulah nak cakap apa...

Arctic Monkeys kot! Why people are so ungrateful... (agak pissed off sekarang)...

Arctic Monkeys fans, try and watch this, and you tell me how would you feel?

(video courtesy from maestro416 at youtube)- Arctic Monkeys My Propeller NEW SONG! Live @ All Points West 8/1/09 NJ

Whatever it is, thank god the video uploader provide some explanation :-

"the crowd was a bit tame for a few reasons:

a) most people don't know who they are over in the states (a shame, i know)

b) a lot of the crowd were tool fans and were uninterested in much of what was played other than the headliner.

c) the conditions of the show were $h!T (foot deep of mud from lots of rain) which people weren't prepared for

d)Their set time was much earlier in the day than it should have been which = less crowd (there were 3 other stages)

Just my 2 cents, take it for what it's worth. I was rocking out and I love this song/album and their new sound. "

So, at least there are reasons that the crowd is tame... however, I'm still annoyed...but yeah, it is all part of a gig, you have to set the right mood and all... but I bet, later they be craving for more Arctic Monkeys.

What I thought about My Propeller is that, the word propeller always make me imagine a plane and a propeller, spinning and not spinning... but that is just visual ramblings in my mind...

Other than that, I just find this song dark (which count for most songs in Humbug) and unbelievebly sexy (yes, Alex Turner's style... I like..hehe)... and somehow most people comment that most song in Humbug, including this should be in James Bond movie.. which is to me, really make sense... yeah... it give listeners that spy-like feeling....I guess

well, the MV is really an artwork and I enjoy it, seeing them in black and white... and the style really fit the music. So love it! enjoy!

Arctic Monkeys :My Propeller

PS : let it be a reminder to all, I love Arctic Monkeys, and they are one of my favourite band... so ...

aaaahhhh.....

For some reason, I just lack of motivation to blog about something, even though there have been a lot of things I want to blog about, a lot of scribbling in my scribble pad... but I just feel lazy... instead of typing a new post, I just went Youtubing all the time (I have watch season 3 of Skins, but before season 4, I thought I want to checkout season 1 and 2... Skins is really f***ed up, man), I don't even have the urge to update my facebook...

But then again, I don't want to repeat the same thing I did last year, which abondaning this blog,... so i thought just give a little update...

whatever it is, I'll be going to BTN next week, yeah gone for about week... and I don't think I can get internet there... okay, probably there is internet, but I don't think I have the strength to go online, when I should be concentrating on BTN... so that's all...

Somehow I feel it is VAMPIRE season...

Okay, I don’t really think much about this, but since I read Star Mag about Vampire Dairies and on Twilight : Eclipse, and the fact I remember back in college, many people are crazy about them....so I just thought I have to say something about it...

Vampire Dairies(VD)???
Is it that great...???? Well, I haven’t watch a full episode of Vampire Dairies yet.
I do love vampires... I think they are the most magnificent fantasy created,

....vampires, dracula...

So I thought I should give VD a try... watch it once... who knows I might get hooked to it... I mean it is about vampires... I love that...

BUT, I don’t think I able to like them as much as I like other Vampires....
I don’t think that I will be able to fall for the vampires in VD.... I still remember not falling for the Cullens in the Twilight... Is it because I think they are cheesy, and seriously CHEESY... but I have my fair share of cheesy vampires... I remember I watch ANGEL regularly , and it was great, cheesy, but still great entertainment.

Is it because the lack of action? Yeah, actually I’m very disappointed with the action in Twilight, not sure about VD....
I enjoy Blade man, and Underworld, Selene is really COOL!!
So, now it seem I just love vampire action movie... so I would not like some drama like VD and Twilight..

But no! That’s not it... it is something else...

And then I think again... YES! That’s it!... sebablah aku tak suka VD, tak minat Twilight...
It because I feel the lack of Vampire feel...

To me those vampires in VD and Twilight are just HUMAN with a vampire body, even the look I believe does not interpreted well....

and characterization? I want to say disappointing, but that’s too harsh... I just say moderate...

Yes, I know they want to promote ‘Vampire with the Human Soul’... but their ‘s are too human... and very less vampire... *boring* ... not thrilling at all...

Vampires should be beautiful.... But also VICIOUS and UNHUMAN....
In short, the Cullen look too pale, but not vicious....
Vampire Dairies , I always mistakes the brothers as the duo in Supernatural, they should be a vampire slayers intead of one... there are nothing too vampire about them... I guess they are just too human beautiful... ( I Guess that is why many people like them so much) but then they don’t give that EERIE , PECULIAR feeling that we should experience as vampire fans...

From above left: The 1st and 2nd are Dracula from Bram Stoker's Dracula played by Gary Oldman, the 3rd and 4th from Angel played by David Boreanaz, Below : All 4 from Interview with the Vampire, Claudia played by Kirsten Dunst, Louis played by Brad Pitt, and the last two are Lestat played by Tom Cruise.
That is how a vampire should really look like.

Vampire can be KIND but not HERO-like...
I cannot really describe how a vampire character should feel or how to portray themselves... but at least to me, a vampire with a human soul should feel lonely, helpless despite their physical ability, longing to die actually, TORTURED... and they never really think of being the HERO, even though they have the human soul, they don’t really feel that they are any better than other vampires...

And this is what I really feel from watching Interview With The Vampire
Cast : Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Kirsten Dunst

I was really upset when Star says that An Interview with A Vampire was a total mis-cast... S***lah wei! It is probably one of the best vampires movie I have watch. (and I actually looking for Anne Rice Vampire Chronicles ..)

The movie really show how truly a vampire would feel... it tells a story of a vampire, Louis played by Brad Pitt being interviewed. He tell the story how he met Lestat played by Tom Cruise that turn him into a vampire. Louis at first, detest the fact that he had to kill in order to live... that he decide to survive just on rats... until he met young girl Claudia, played by Kirsten Dunst. Unable to hold his hunger any longer, he took a bite of Claudia and Lestat saw this, happy he was, that finally Louis being true to himself as a vampire. Then Lestat turn Claudia as a vampire too, and the three of them live together. Claudia was loved by both Louis and Lestat, as a child but also as an apprentice to Lestat. But things get worse when Claudia decide to get get rid of Lestat and this has lead to tragic event for the three of them.

This was very entertaining, I felt disturbed by the scenes, sometimes out of breath but never tired of it... Besides, Brad Pitt... who can say no to that...

And the young Kirsten Dunst is really the kick, the extra spice I would say... I still remember the first time I watch it, I cried when Claudia burn to ashes, and it was also heart-breaking to watch the relationship between Claudia and Louis. Especially when Claudia tell Louis that Armand will take him away from her. Armand, played by Antonio Banderas. Their meeting with Armand and the Theatre des Vampires in Paris eventually lead to Claudia's death.
Ok, to tell the truth, it does feel weird to see Tom Cruise as a blond vampires, but he pulled it off and the appearance of Antonio Banderas... I can ignore...
5 out of 5, a MUST-WATCH!

Ps: I’m not anti Twilight or anti-VD... I just sharing my opinions, and about my favourite vamp movie... I just feel that, if you are crazy about vampires in Twilight and VD... you should also watch this...

Vampire Suggestion other than Interview With The Vampire:
Bram Stoker Dracula (Gary Oldman,Antony Hopkins, Winona Ryder, Keanu Reaves)
Queen of The Damned (Aaliyah, Stuart Townsend)

Night Watch (Russian movie) and its sequel, Day Watch

Vampire Knight (anime)

Blood: The Last Vampire (anime and the movie adaptation)

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

Maybe I would give Twilight saga and Vampire Dairies a chance...